Christmas is a magical time of year for most of us; whether it’s because we are celebrating an important part of Christianity, or just simply revelling in the goodwill of giving and receiving gifts. It’s a time of year when families gather together; when friends reunite, and when charities genuinely care more about their cause than balancing the books. It’s a time of year when bosses appreciate their workers; when workers appreciate their bosses, and when being part of something trivial is much more appealing than being part of nothing at all.
But for many people, Christmas is a time of reflecting on past events that occurred at this time of year, and in particular the effects of bereavement can be extremely difficult to cope with. In fact, many people who have lost a loved one at this time of year point-blankly refuse to celebrate anything to do with Christmas.
When I was eleven years old, my grandmother passed over to spirit on Christmas Eve. She died instantly from a massive stroke and the shock destroyed my mother. Christmas was a non-event that year and for several years afterwards. We still had a Christmas tree and received gifts but to see your mother cry on Christmas Day is no fun for a child.
For some people, even the slightest mention of anything to do with Christmas can be too painful. When all others are celebrating, there is a pain in your heart that digs deep within your soul – and it won’t go away. And it seems like you are the only person in the world who feels this way – but there are many sufferers, hiding within themselves, trying to put a brave face on it rather than appearing to be miserable and spoil the party.
Life can seem so cruel in this case and I have real sympathy with someone affected in this way. However, I cannot tell someone to pull themselves together and get on with their lives – only they can do this personally. But what I can say is that for every individual that I’ve spoken to regarding bereavement, I have never yet communicated with a loved one in spirit who is happy that the people they have left behind are suffering – especially at Christmas.
In fact, when we mourn someone who has passed over then they too feel the emotional pain that we do. Furthermore, the person in spirit will be desperately trying to amend this fact, and will be doing everything possible to get their loved one to talk to a spirit medium. And the message will always be –“Do not feel sad nor guilty at my passing over as I am always just a thought away, whenever you need a hand to hold or a shoulder to cry on. But you must live a life that benefits you and whoever is closest to you – that’s all that really matters to me.”
If you have lost someone close to you at this time of year then I promise you that they are close by your side, holding your hand and offering a shoulder to cry on. And if you decide to get out your Christmas tree, throw up some decorations, invite round some friends round for a glass of wine, and maybe even brave a smile – then I guarantee you that your loved one in spirit will shed a tear, but it will be of happiness and not sadness.
Have a fantastic Christmas – you’ve earned it!